WHATEVER I TELL YOU GUYS HERE IN LJ I'D LIKE IT IF YOU GUYS KEEP IT JUST BETWEEN US.

OMG! i just got done watching that one old movie Butterfly Lovers on crunchyroll and it's so so so sad! i'm still crying right now. T_T the movie is so sad! i saw it a super long time ago and couldn't remember it well. i found it on crunchyroll today and watched it. it's so sad! i don't know how much longer i'm going to cry. the movie is so sad! he died at the end! and then she was crying for days until her tears turned to blood. that's so sad! T_T

well it's been a while since i've been here. i'm still in the people program and it's the last week this week. ^_^ i'm happy to be going back home on saturday. but yea... i've been working on my essay for my writing class and my teacher's helping me revise it. so far he says he likes my essay and that i just need to make a few changes in the beginning and i'm good to go. i saw that he was doing a lot of writing on and correcting on my first page and then the rest he didn't write anything else except for a few mistakes from typing too fast! ^_^

laura you just have to get out more. i'm tired of looking at pictures only. i like to see certain things for myself now. it's a lot more fun that way. ^_^ anyways! school's ending! i have two more full days and two half days and i'm done! but gosh! i'm so worried about exams! i don't know how i'm going to pass my english class! laura do you know mr. bullock? well yea... i have his pre-ib english class and it's hard for me! i don't understand the stuff! T_T i'm going to fail! i think i have a B in his class right now. or maybe even a C! last quater i passed his class with an A because i exempt his class! now i don't know what i'm going to do! AH! and mr. west! his history class! i don't know history! i'm so worried! but i think i should be able to get C on the exam and i have a C in his class so i should get a C for my overrall grade! and then there's math i'll pass. there's french. we do nothing in there. i'm exempting it just because that class is a waste of my time.

no worries. i know what i'm doing. but yea... yao's stalking me now. he came to my house late at night and he saw my light on so he went home can called me at 2 am in the morning! -_-;; isn't that stalking?!?! he said that he was just passing by because he went jogging late at night. out of all the places to jog! MY HOUSE! he's stalking me foreal! i told him he was stalking me and i think he realized it too but he just doesn't want to say he is. he's crazy and kind of scaring me a little. as long as he doesn't try anything then i won't kill him. ^_^

OMG! i'm so happy right now! we won our first softball game today! we went agains riverside and won! the score was 19 to 2! :D oh man that was cool! i made three homeruns! and i would have made 5 BUT the 4th time we had the third out. and i was on third base too! and then the 5th time i was on second base and the game was over. but who cares! WE WON! ^_^

MY BOO IS BACK!!!! SARANG HAE HO SUK! <3

남자도...어쩔 수 없다
Even man...can be so helpless


입술이 모두 말라가고
My lips, dissuades everything.

한숨이 자꾸 잦아들고
With one breath, I keep on searching and listening.

이 사랑이 지쳐 시들도록
too tired to embark on this love.

난 이렇게 버려둔다
you throw me away like this.

널 하나도 기억 못한다고
you said, you can’t remember anything.

널 무심히 모두 잊었다고
you dismissed and forgot everything.

하루종일 날 봐도
eventhough you stare at me the whole day,

아무도 알지 못할만큼
you seem to not know anything.

무슨 일이 있는 듯 없는 듯
wether or not something happened,

희미해진다
there’s no meaning anymore.

나 표정 없이 살다
I live on without an expression.

마음 없이 살다
I live on without a heart.

나 그런대로 이렇게
I live on like this

나 술을 마셔 본다
I tried to drown myself in alcohol

너에 취해 본다
I look at you in a drunken state

더 흘릴 눈물 하나 없는데
there’s not a single tear to shed anymore

남자도 사랑 앞에선 모두 어쩔 수 없다
Even man can be so helpless in the face of love.

너를 묻고 살다 자꾸 꺼내 본다
I keep on asking myself as I live on. I take it all out too see everything.

너는 모르겠지 이런 나
You don’t know the me who’s like that right?

말수가 점점 줄어들고
I gradually hear less and less.

끊은 담배가 더 늘어가고
The finished smoke kept on expanding

자꾸만 멍하게 지내는
I keep on being stupefied as the days pass.

시간이 점점 길어지고
the time gradually becomes longer

난 어디에도 마음을
no matter where I am, my heart

가슴을 둘 수 없는데
my chest, I can’t hear it

나 표정 없이 살다
I live on without an expression.

마음 없이 살다
I live on without a heart.

나 그런대로 이렇게
I live on like this

나 술을 마셔 본다
I tried to drown myself in alcohol

너에 취해 본다
I look at you in a drunken state

더 흘릴 눈물 하나 없는데
there’s not a single tear to shed anymore

남자도 사랑 앞에선 모두 어쩔 수 없다
Even man can be so helpless in the face of love.

너를 묻고 살다 자꾸 꺼내 본다
I keep on asking myself as I live on. I take it all out too see everything.

너는 모르겠지 이런 나
You don’t know the me who’s like that right?

괜찮아 늘 말을 하며
it’s okay if I keep on talking

겨우 하루를 또 보낸다
and the day barely passed

숨만 쉬며 살다 너를 잃고 산다
I live on as I rest my breath. I live on as I forget you.

그런대로 이렇게
just like this

숨을 쉬긴 한다 살아지긴 한다
As I rest my breath and protect my life,

더 흘릴 눈물 하나 없는데
there’s not a single tear to shed anymore

남자도 사랑 앞에선 모두 어쩔 수 없다
even man can be so helpless in the face of love

하고 싶던 말이 못해줬던 말이
the words that I want to say, that word that I can’t say

자꾸 입안에서 맴돌아
keeps on lingering in my lips

아무렇지 않은듯
just like nothing happened

말해본다 혼잣말
I’ll try to talk, talk to myself

Hard to breath

사랑해 미안하다
I love you. I’m sorry.

OMG! two jobs! softball pratice until 6 everyday after school! study study study for exams next week! SO BUSY BUSY BUSY! T_T

this is how i looked on valentines day. ^_^ very pretty! lols. not to brag but i do look good! lols. j/k but yea... a lot of things have happened since i posted. me and yao still never got to give each other our valentines gifts. well! i won the essay contest at my school and got 75 bucks and two movie passes! but that was in feb! and then i got a job at mickey D now! it's the one close your house laura. hm......... but they only pay me 5. 90! T_T so little! i just started this past saturday. i'm gonna work two jobs if my friend gets me in at boston though. and then i've been so extra busy because softball started on monday! i'm in softball now! and i like it a lot! it's really cool cause yea... i'm actually not so bad at it. my hits are pretty good. i think i may be better at softball then tennis. i dont' know... we'll see the real game! ^_^ well i'm gonna go so yea... laters! i'll tell about my first softball day next time. i'm too tired to type more.

ahahha! laura atown is this website, asiantown.com. well yea... HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY EVERYONE! ^_^ man i baked cup cakes for my friends at school! they said it was good! unless they lied to me! T_T well anyways! yea! my daddy gave me a valentine card! ^_^ <3 WOW! and i won bingo for our math bingo game today! i got a free juice! :P yummy! ahahha! hm............. what else to say. OH! i didn't see yao today and he didn't see me. but yea... we need to exchange gifts. yea yea yea... fine i'll tell you guys what i got him! gosh! lols.. j/k but yea.. i got him these teddy bears that kiss each other. but you know it's kind of weird to give kissy bears to a guy. -_-;; besides i want to keep them for myself because i like playing with them. but yea... that's what i bought him. and yea i curled my hair today so i looked extra sexy, hot, pretty, beautiful, and any other nice word there is. lols! well i'm gonna go so laters people! and what did you guys do for valentine's day?

AHAHAHAHHAHAAHAHHA! squanto was this native american guy who helped the pilgrims grow crops. lols! you guys are funny. but yea... that's all mr. west said about him. and then he went on to talking about why squanto might have helped the pilgrims, like he might have wanted something from the pilgrims in return. but yea... anyways. very weird feeling today man. i went on my exboyfriend's atown today and somehow felt happy for him that he was married. O_O very very weird. i wanted to write a comment saying that i was happy for them but my friend told me not to because then it would be really weird. and then i went on mailor's atown and read what she wrote about her mom and about her marrage. i was happy for her. weird man. wassup with me today. maybe i'm just being weird. but oh well! i'm happy for them! ^_^ great job shing! =D

HI!!!!!!!!! haven't been here for a while! so how's everyone?!?! i'm all good! i'm keeping up with my school work. i barely have time for yao. -_-;; new quater new classes. i have engish with mr. bullock for first block, algrebra 2 with ms pac for second block, U.S. history with mr. west for thrid block, and freach 2 with ms daly for fourth block. very boring classes. well history was intresting today. we were talking about squanto. lols! we were talking about the english coming to the "new world". and then one of our classmates brought up squanto and mr. west told us about squanto. it was funny though. i love my class. we're always together in every class so we know each other and we're comfortable with each other so yea... and our class has about 3 class clowns. XD the funniest one in my opinion is vang. lols! well i have to go... i'll write more whenever i can.

Look DER! ^_^ you and tou is it??? ahaha... lols!

today was a great day because i had fun. but i'm sad because i didn't know the stuff on image technology exam. -_-;; oh well... i THINK i should get about a 3.5. i know i have A's for my other three classes. ^_^ but yea... after exams today me, yeng, pakou, mailee, yao, and tony went swimming and played tennis! it was fun swimming although i swallowed a lot of water. -_-;; after swimming we were playing tennis. then we wanted to go to mcd. so me tony and mailee went to go get mcd and the rest stayed at the tennis courts. i sat between mailee and tony. XD he has a truck like my dad use to have. and i was like ahahahhah! MOMMY! DADDY! cause i use to follow my dad and my mom everywhere when i was younger(before juliann came along) and i would sit in the middle between them just like how i was sitting between mailee and tony. ahahaha the whole way to mcd they had to listen to me call them mommy and daddy! funny thing is too! mailee is just a little bit taller then tony just like my mom's a little bit taller then my dad! so funny! ahahahahahahahahahahahahahah! but yea... i had a great day today. i had fun and now i'm tired! although we didn't get to play tennis long enough. there's still tomorrow though. i might go play tennis tomorrow. MAYBE! damn hnia has school so he can't take me. maybe i'll just call up yeng them see if they want to go then we can just take the bus to the park! yea and we can go swimming again! oh yea! so cool! and i can do all this before my mom gets home! all i have to do is just ask my dad to let me go and most likely he'll let me go! YAY!!!! i can even ask him to pick up yeng them! HOW COOL!

we had exams today for 1st and 2nd block! i think overall i did pretty good on both exams. ^_^ tomorrow i have my 4th block exam which is image tech. sucks man. i dont' know the definition of each word and i dont' follow the dumb packets so i dont' know the stuff. but i do know how to do the stuff on adobe though! so not fair! but yea after exams today i went to go hang out with yao and tony. we went to aladin's castle(an arcade) i watched them play inital D lols! they're all serious while racing! i wanted to mess them both up so badly but i didn't. it was very tempting though. ahahah! and tomorrow we're going swimming! just me yao and tony. i think crystal's gonna come but most likely not because her grandma just passed away. so sad man. she just lost her grandpa a few months ago. -_-;; but yea... i'm going to play tennis with yao them then swim! i'm so happy cause i haven't gone swimming for a few months now! YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!! bad thing though. i can't find my blue swimming suit so i have to wear my purple one. -_-;; it's kind of small! :( oh well... ahahha! i'm wearing a shirt over it so it's fine. but yea! I GET TO SWIM! so happy! ahahahahha! i'm hoping to get a 4.0 this quater! but i'm not sure yet. we'll see after my grades come out! wish me luck you guys!

hey everyone! i just bought a new hat. but i'm not sure how it is... -_-;; i think it's cute but i'm not sure how i look with it.

AH!!!!!!! it was so boring at the wedding! waste of time! -_-;; the only fun thing we did was when me, lena, juliann, and hnia went to mcd to eat breakfast. -_-;; other then that it was boring as hell! >_< waste of time. anyways!!!!!!!! i don't think i'll ever see my cousin ever again until a few years later. anyways... i have to go to band today. ARGH! so boring! i forgot to say that there was a wedding i have to go to. today IS tony vang's wedding anyways. damn it. i regret it. but my teacher said that we have a so called important meeting today. the lao family people wants us to play for their new year. oh god. they haven't heard us playing yet man. dude wait until they hear us! they'll regret having us play for sure! i dislike the way the kids over there are. they act like they don't wnat to be there. they're always complainning about not going either. they make me not want to go because they have no dedication for that band. i do but then they don't! i rather join another band that's more dedicated. -_-;; these kids dont' understand that what we're doing is for the hmong community. with them in this band i can't give anything to the hmong community around me. these kids aren't dedicated at all. -_-;; that is why i hate going to band. they waste my time and they waste the teacher's time. sucker head kids.

i guess i'm going to the wedding after all. my sister is home now and we're just gonna come back today. good thing we're not sleeping. <()(-_-)()> if we were i would not go at all! man! i dont' even feel like going! but oh well... my mom woke me up early as hell! and then she was like yea if you guys are still tired then you and lena can just come later. then my sister was like what?!?!? then why did you make me drive all the way from chicago early in the morning?!?!? and i was like what/!??!! why did you wake me up so early?!?!?! -_-;; gosh... -_-;; the things parents do... well i'm bring my mp3 player so at least i have something to entertain me. i would bring my book but then i might end up leaving it in oshkosh. so forget it. hehehehe... anyways! hm.......................... i think thats about today. my weekend wasted in oshkosh! that'll be my next entry subject. i'll tell you guys how the wedding goes when i get back. -_-;; gosh i really don't want to go! oh well... quit complaining! i'm going and that's final! ARGH!

AH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU ALL TURNED YOUR BACKS ON ME!!!!!!! NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and no my mom wouldn't make me go laura. she said it was fine if i stay. and no i'm not going to the haunted house with yao on saturday anymore because i went yesterday night with angel, pangnhia, and mailor. it was scary! well i'm still not sure about going. and i dont' think i want a lot of people at my wedding. just a few childhood friends/family and a few close friends thats all. LOOK! this is want me and yao are doing! we're making faces at each other on msn. (^_^) (X_x) (x_-) (*...*) (O_o) <()(-_-)()> (=_-) <- - - - - -- this is how yao looks is he trys anything! muahahahha! so evil! <()(OoO)()> <- - - - -- - - funny looking one. <()($o$)()> <-- - - - - - this is how i look when i see money! ahahahahahah! well... people i'm gonna go i'll see if i go to the wedding or not. -_-;;

ahahahha! der i dont' have money! i was saying "IF" you give me 100 bucks! man... i need to shop when i'm down. i feel a lot better after i go shopping. it's so boring! i'm not going to my cousin's wedding this weekend. i don't want to... well i wouldn't mind going. but it's gonna be so boring there! i have other things to do. like watch movies and finish reading my book! i dont' know... tell me what you guys think. should i go or should i not go? and then if i don't go it gives me time to spend with yao. we never get to be together. and then tony said that he's welling to come pick me up to go to the haunted house with them on saturday. but that's not the reason why i want to stay instead of going to the wedding too. i don't want to go because there's gonna be a lot of people there and then their house is really small too! and it's gonna bother me a lot. plus my cousin's gonna have all her good friends and cousins there so i'm gonna be like sitting off to the side being quiet like usual. which sucks. you don't know the feeling man... -_-;; i hate going there because they always leave me out. that's why during the new year i left them and went with our other cousins that live here in milwaukee. -_-;; sucks hanging out with them. it's boring! because i'm not like them. and they talk to white wash that it bothers me. they talk girly white. oh well... i dont' know. what do you guys think? stay and go with yao them or go and sit at the wedding and be bored to death!?!?!?